Don't know what to say....
Jun. 9th, 2010 03:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
collowrathI check this site at least every other day. I don't really follow anyone openly and I sincerely doubt there is anyone interested in reading it, but hey, the point of this place was for me to have an area to organize and write down my thoughts online. Except, every time I come by, I find that I have no idea what I want to write.
This is a direct product of not having done a single thing. Sure, I started a big garden and lifestyle project, but I set up another blog to keep track of that (and to help keep me motivated), but what with all the other changes in my life, I haven't been able to get into the photography and writing aspect. Not to mention, I'm using the Partner's computer since I managed to fuck mine up. hopefully I'll be able to jostle myself into working on it, but frankly, this living situation with my father is not working out. Sure, I'm living in his house and am thus subject to his hospitality/good graces, but he flat-out refuses to treat me like a human being. He hasn't got a single concern or ounce of respectable attitude in his body. He figures (and this is a translation of his own words), that since he works a full work week he shouldn't have to pitch in, help cook his own dinner, wash his own laundry, etc, like everyone else in the world. It doesn't matter that everyone else in this house either has a job or another full-time obligation.
I feel trapped, beaten, used, and defeated. I'm not even sure how to get it all out in a way that doesn't sound like a rotten brat; I wish I could just show people directly, like a mind meld or something, but alas, I haven't figured that one out yet.
This is a direct product of not having done a single thing. Sure, I started a big garden and lifestyle project, but I set up another blog to keep track of that (and to help keep me motivated), but what with all the other changes in my life, I haven't been able to get into the photography and writing aspect. Not to mention, I'm using the Partner's computer since I managed to fuck mine up. hopefully I'll be able to jostle myself into working on it, but frankly, this living situation with my father is not working out. Sure, I'm living in his house and am thus subject to his hospitality/good graces, but he flat-out refuses to treat me like a human being. He hasn't got a single concern or ounce of respectable attitude in his body. He figures (and this is a translation of his own words), that since he works a full work week he shouldn't have to pitch in, help cook his own dinner, wash his own laundry, etc, like everyone else in the world. It doesn't matter that everyone else in this house either has a job or another full-time obligation.
I feel trapped, beaten, used, and defeated. I'm not even sure how to get it all out in a way that doesn't sound like a rotten brat; I wish I could just show people directly, like a mind meld or something, but alas, I haven't figured that one out yet.